About That

This blog has taken on many different themes and purposes, and now, I think I finally know what to do with it.

 

Just write.

 

I'm not someone that forces things. Probably to my detriment, a bit, but I've never been someone that does something he doesn't want to do. It's caused me problems, at times, but it's also cleared the deck for me to focus on things that actually matter to me.

 

In any case, I guess I was gonna write a lot about writing here, before realizing that I get bored with that subject very quickly. Besides, my process is far less interesting than most others' processes. In life, and in writing, simpler is better, and the fewer constraints you place on yourself, the freer you are to soar to new heights, or glide gracefully to the crouch with a laptop and just write.

 

So, while I may still write about writers writing, I'm opening this blog up to be about everything that I care about. This includes gaming, baseball, football, technology, software/web development, and just whatever takes my fancy.

 

Some posts will be quite length, while others may only be a few sentences. Some may even be video posts (WHOAH.)

 

I've added my Twitch feed above, as well as a 'current' section in the top left. Feel free to engage me on anything you see there.

 

Production

My day job is now as a C# developer. It's a great job, and I really like the challenge of developing a new skillset, plus I'm part of a great team, and the work is more than satisfying.

 

Outside of that, I'm developing what I think might become a web 'TV' series. I've worked in technology for quite a while now, and want to start telling some stories that have sprung from that life.

 

Right now, I'm envisioning an initial six-episode 'first season,' and I'm considering just producing it myself. I might Kickstarter it, I might not, but I need to get them written first.

 

Aside from that, I'm always dabbling with modding games, but I've been frustrated, because I keep changing what game, what engine, and I probably need to seek out some advice on how to get started. I'm thinking, more and more, I need to bang out a rough story, and then make my decision that way.

 

Further down the road, there's another novel and another rock record. Actually, a few novels. There's another Endless Wars book that has some real meat to it, but that I keep walking away from, as well as a very weird start to a space merchant novella series.

 

The space merchant novella series is an experiment, in which I do a 'season' of novellas that each tell a story within a larger arc, and I'll release each one for something like a dollar, or even less. We'll see. I'm still trying to work out how that would work. Maybe I'll just release each 'episode' for free, then sell the complete collection at the end of the 'season.' I dunno.

 

Regardless, I wanna get the six scripts for the IT web series done first, then start talking to some folks about the next move there.

 

And, yeah, I really wanna make a story-based mod for Dragon Age, or maybe Divinity: Original Sin, or maybe Skyrim, or maybe the upcoming Wasteland 2 and/or Pillars of Eternity.

 

Consumption

It's been a reeeally slow year in music. REALLY slow. Granted, all my bands dropped new records either last year or the year before. I've been jamming to the new Robert Plant, as well as the new Slash record, and Asteroids Galaxy Tour is releasing a new record next week, and I'm expecting that to be my favorite record this year.

 

It's been too good a year for science fiction on TV. There's so much that I've actually started dropping shows or telling some that I'll be back with them later.

 

However, my two favorite so far this year are not science fiction. True Detective and The Bridge have both knocked me out with how well-written, beautifully acted, and really well-shot they are. Both of those shows are the complete package.

 

The Strain, though, comes close to that level of enjoyment. I enjoyed the first two books (third is in the queue), and absolutely love the show.

 

Reading-wise, I'm still reconciling Disney's declaration that all books, games, and comics before 'A New Dawn' are null and void. It's hard to imagine a Star Wars without events from the 'Old Republic' era being part of the canon. Same goes for the X-Wing series, and a lot of the books from the Clone Wars era, which featured some of my favorite Jedi.

 

In any case, the new novel, 'A New Dawn,' is a solid read thus far. It sets up a couple of the characters that will be featured in the new animated series, 'Rebels.'

 

Gaming-wise, after a HUGE push through the Elder Scrolls Online, I'm taking a break from that series, and finishing my third playthrough of the Dragon Age series, in preparation for Dragon Age: Inqiusition on 11/18.

 

Last on the gaming front, Destiny. A little game from a little developer known as Bungie.

 

It's an MMO FPS, and that's exactly what it is. It's a blend of Halo, WoW, and Diablo. I really like it so far, but it's weird playing a console shooter. I hope this comes to PC eventually.

 

Going Forward

I'm not locking myself into any format here, but I would at least like to post everyday. I'm going to play with the content, and please let me know when something is good or bad.

 

Has there been anything I've done on here before that you really liked? (as if anyone is listening yet)

 

-Blaine

 

Winter is Coming

Yes, I haven't posted since August. Things got really, really busy on a professional level, and like a professional, I had to triage my personal life. One of the easiest things to discard, albeit temporarily, is this blog.

That being said, things have settled down a bit, for now, and I'm slowly coming to trust reality again. There were a couple weeks there where I was so worn down that I was literally having to devote energy into not poisoning my own thoughts. I know it sounds like crazy psycho-babble, but most people let a single event shape their perception of something, rather than letting the average experience from a large sample size inform their perspective. In this case, I was fighting against an extremely tough week that came after 6-8 hard weeks, and my mind wanted to blame 'the job.' My mind wanted to paint 'the job' in a very negative light, and hate it, and fear it, and just do whatever it took to get away from it.

That would've been stupid. My rational mind, though it was broken and bleeding, kept reminding me, 'you have a really great job.'

I'm a system administrator, in case you didn't know, and it's the best damn job in the world. It's hard, hard work, but it's always interesting, always changing, there's no college degree for it, and it makes you one of the elite that literally run the world.

Anyway, being a sysadmin is weird in that the job ramps up and down, seemingly at random. If shit is gonna break, it's gonna break one after another for a few weeks or months, and then things will be quiet for a few weeks or months. It's this way in the corporate world, at least. In the academic world, it's a little more predictable.

Getting back to the point, though, one of the hardest things to do is maintain a rational, detached perspective. It's like my dad always says, 'Quit being so fucking emotional.' Good advice.

But, if you're anything like me, you're a passionate person and you've made it this far due in part to the fact that you're a passionate person. Your emotions are what help propel you, but you have to know that they can work against you, too.

What I've found is that the higher you go, the more selective you have to be about when it's appropriate to let yourself really feel, and when it's not. It's okay to be a Klingon sometimes, but you have to be straight-up Vulcan at other times.

What's difficult is that we live in a time in which society insists that we cry, laugh, and express our true selves all the time, and even thinking about just shutting your damn mouth and shoving your feelings down is anathema, even nearly heretical, in this day and age.

See, I think that's stupid. I can't function in this world if I'm giving in to my feelings all the time, or even allowing myself to feel them. I have to be selective, or I can't be a productive, reasoned person.

A big part of the reason why I have a healthy marriage is I know when my feelings are wrong.

A big part of the reason that I've been able to salvage my professional life to the point where I'm working a 'real' job (I even have a cubicle) is I'm learning when to shut my mouth and turn my feelings off.

A big part of the reason that I have a few really great friends is because I'm getting better and better at not being that asshole that hijacks the conversation and makes it all about me when they need to talk something out.

I refuse to be one of the mewling, whimpering 'sensitive' guys. I'd rather be a man that has some goddam pride in himself.

Now, before one of you sensitive guys start crying and shrieking in the comments, let me frame all this in the context that I'm a strong believer in 'balance.' All things in this life must be balanced, including what I'm saying here. I've actually cried in front of my wife once or twice, and when I wasn't a drunk attention whore, it was for good reason. Passion and feelings are necessary to life, but I don't think people should be governed solely by them. Logic and reason MUST be able to override them if one is to truly enjoy life.

All things in balance.

I'd like to get back to writing more. I'm also thinking about posting over at Untitled Gaming again. Been doing a lot of gaming lately to help 'clear the mechanism'.

-Blaine

BTW - You should buy either a book or an ebook!